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Parshat
Ki Teytzey - Expectations Parshat Ki Teytzey sets forth a series of laws that seemingly do not make sense together. These laws include the captive woman, rights of the firstborn, a rebellious son, hanging a murderer, other people’s property, cross dressing, a bird’s nest, mix breeding (including mixing linen and wool), a defamed wife, a married woman, a betrothed woman, a virgin, divorce, loans, punishment for sins of a child, produce for the poor, marrying your deceased brother’s widow (known as Yibum, the Levirite marriage), remembering Amalek, and more. As we begin our school year, we must think long and hard about how each child learns, knowing that every child learns in a different way. What one may recognize as rebelliousness may in fact be normal growing pains. We often project onto our children unrealistic expectations of what we want based on our own experiences and not allowing our children to learn and experience on their own. In fact according to the Parsha, if we deem our rebellious son (child) incapable of listening to us, the punishment was death. This goes hand in hand with one of our big ten in the Commandments. When God gave the Jewish people the Ten Commandments, He told us to “Honor our Mother and Father and our days will be lengthened”. As many of us remember and as many adolescent children will tell us, honoring parents is a difficult thing to do. Let’s match this however with another law (command) from this week’s Parsha. It tells us that when we come to a bird’s nest and want the eggs, we must first send away the mother bird. The reward – our days will be lengthened. As most of us have experienced, when you walk towards a bird, its first inclination is to run away. This makes this the easiest commandment to follow. Why is it then that its reward (your days will be lengthened) is the same as that of the most difficult (honoring your mother and your father)? It is to teach us that each commandment has an equal importance. We can’t simply ignore the rebellious son who seems to be dishonoring his parents; we need to model for them the correct behavior. Do we show honor to our adult parents? Do we show respect to their teachers and school administrators/staff? This doesn’t simply happen when we see these people, this must happen when we talk about them with our children. They will pick up on our lead.
AS A FAMILY: Call a
Grandparent to say hello and talk about your week.
FOR FURTHER DISCUSSION: |