Chaye Sarah – Eishet Chayil (Woman of Valor)

Each week on Friday evening we sing a beautiful song in my home called Eishet Chayil (Woman of Valor).  The song is an acrostic (a song in alphabetical order) that speaks of the virtues of a woman (women).  When I was first dating my wife, Jessica, she would not allow me to sing this song to her (traditionally it is a song sung by a man to his wife).  I used to joke about it with my friend Jay who had had the same problem with his wife Jackie when they were dating.  He told me that the first time he sang her the song was immediately after their wedding ceremony in the Yichud (private, alone-time) room.  Taking a page from my groomsmen’s playbook, I decided that in our Yichud room I would sing Eishet Chayil to Jessica for the first time.  The words made sense to me – “a woman of valor, who can find?”  And I had just married her.

                Abraham must have felt the same about his beloved Sarah.  Her name means princess and to Abraham she was.  When she died at the age of one-hundred and twenty seven, commentaries explain that she had the wisdom of a woman of one-hundred, the beauty of a woman of twenty and the innocence of a girl of seven.

                Abraham’s first act upon her death was to secure a spot for burial, to give her honor.  He purchased Maarat Hamachpela, “the cave of pairs”.  In this cave Abraham will be buried next to Sarah, along with Isaac and Rebecca, Jacob and Leah.

                Abraham grieved at the loss of his wife and brought honor to her by making sure that a wife that she would approve of would be found for Issac.  Rivkah passes the test by fetching water for Eliezer (Abraham’s servant) and his camels.  Upon seeing Rivkah, Isaac immediately falls in love with her, realizing that he had found his “woman of valor.”

                How do we show our children that we value our spouse?  Do we tell them that we love them?  Do we sing to them?  Do we show them that we love them?  Showing our children that we love and value our spouse will allow them to make better decisions about who to date and eventually who to marry.

                                                AS A FAMILY:     Sing/Read Eishet Chayil in Hebrew and/or English.  Discuss these virtues 
                                                                           as a family and how the matriarch(s) in your family embody them.

                                                FOR FURTHER DISCUSSION:
                                                                1.            How does Eliezer find a wife for Isaac?
                                                                2.            Who is Keturah?
                                                                3.            Who buries Abraham?